


wept bitterly

by theoreticlove



Series: the sunset glows [4]
Category: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Allusions to Ecthelion’s Death, Beach Days Don’t Always Go Well If You Drowned, Happy Ending, Like Barely Any Tbh, M/M, minimal angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-20
Updated: 2019-08-20
Packaged: 2020-09-19 10:56:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20329996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theoreticlove/pseuds/theoreticlove
Summary: ecthelion never goes swimming with his daughter





	1. the crashing waves

Ecthelion barely managed to avoid flinching as he and his family approached the ocean, the waves crashing gently onto the sandy beach. 

“Are you okay?” Glorfindel whispered, squeezing Ecthelion’s hand gently. Ecthelion nodded, staring out at the horizon in front of him. Ilvanë skipped beside them, delighted.

Ilvanë loved going to the beach, loved swimming with Glorfindel and, on the rare occasion that Laitar joined them, playing games with her elder sibling. 

Ecthelion, however, was not so fond of the excursions. As they neared their usual picnic spot, Ecthelion, instead of preparing to get in the water like Glorfindel and Ilvanë, set their blanket down on the sand and sat on top of it.

“Stay where I can see you,” he told Ilvanë. “And you,” he said, pointing at Glorfindel, “make sure I can see both of you.”

“Atto, I know! You say this every time!” Ilvanë said, her voice laced with annoyance. Ecthelion frowned- she had never been annoyed with him about this before.

“I just want to make sure you stay safe, dearest.” He explained.

“Then come swimming with me and that way you can keep me safe! You never come swimming with us!”

Ecthelion felt a pang of guilt in his chest. He hated not being able to go swim with his daughter, but he simply couldn’t. He was- being in the water terrified him beyond all reason. He knew, logically, that he would be perfectly safe, but the thought of even risking being underwater once more made him feel sick to his stomach.

“I know, but I-“

“It’s not fair! I want to have fun with you but instead you just sit here and watch every time. You never have any fun with me!”

“Ilvanë, that’s enough.” Glorfindel said, frowning as he put a hand on Ilvanë’s shoulder.

“It’s true! He never plays in the water with us. It’s dumb! We’re his family and atto says he loves us and wants us to be happy, so why doesn’t he come swimming with us? That would make me happy!”

Tears sprang to Ecthelion’s eyes and he wiped them away as quickly as he could. He had never cried in front of Ilvanë and didn’t want to start now. 

“Ilvanë, my dearest, my beloved daughter, I love you very much. And I am so,” he began, voice cracking as he spoke, “so sorry that I can’t come swimming with you. If I could, I would, you must know that.”

Quickly he wiped a tear off his face before Ilvanë could see, but he was not quick enough. 

“Atto?” Ilvanë said, her bottom lip quivering dangerously. “Atto, I’m sorry.”

Ecthelion managed a small smile. 

“It’s okay, dearest. Come here,” he said, opening his arms to give her a hug. “I love you.” 

“I love you too, atto. I’m sorry. I don’t want you to cry!”

“I won’t cry, then. I promise. Now, go have fun with atar.”

Ilvanë nodded, before running off. Suddenly she stopped, doubling back to come stand in front of Ecthelion again.

“I promise to stay where I can see you,” she said. Ecthelion beamed at her and kissed her cheek. 

“Thank you, dearest.”

Ilvanë stayed true to her word, and Ecthelion watched, smiling as his daughter and husband splashed in the waves.


	2. a safe warmth

Ilvanë sits among her classmates, idly flipping through the pages of the small history book that had been handed out. Her teacher droned on about the intricacies of some treaty in a city called Gondolin, which was the topic of her history book. Ilvanë didn’t particularly care. And her teacher was boring. Surely there were better ways to teach her students about things? Ilvanë’s parents always made things interesting when they told her about their lives before she had been born. 

Then again, they were her parents, so Ilvanë was naturally more inclined to want to hear their stories. 

Her eyes flickered to the paper in front of her, and she stopped short when she read her father’s name. 

_Ecthelion of the Fountain drowned FA 510 after killing Gothmog, Lord of Balrogs. He was reembodied in the year..._

Ilvanë closed the book.

Her atto had drowned. Drowned. Was that why... was that why he never came swimming with them? And he always made her and atya promise to stay where he could see them?

She had made atto cry because he wouldn’t come swimming with her!

A foreign emotion settled in Ilvanë’s stomach as she fought back tears. She had made her father cry and she felt so very very bad. 

“Okay, class is over! You can all go home now,” her teacher said as she finished her lecture. Ilvanë shot out of the room, grabbing her lunch bag and sprinting home. She ran mostly on memory of the path she took every day, fighting back tears. 

She ran into her house, searching frantically for her atto. She threw open the door to the patio and flung herself into his arms as she saw him sitting on his chair, playing his flute peacefully.

“Ilvanë, dearest! Is everything alright?” Ecthelion asked, setting down his flute and moving to wrap his arms around her.

“Atto I didn’t know! I didn’t know I promise! I didn’t know,” Ilvanë sobbed, clinging to Ecthelion.

“Now now, everything’s okay. What didn’t you know?” Ecthelion soothed, kissing her head and rubbing her back gently. He frowned, wondering why his beloved daughter was so upset.

“At the beach I made you sad but I didn’t know you drowned atto I promise! I didn’t know!” 

Oh, Ecthelion realised. 

“I know, my dearest Ilvanë. I know that you didn’t know. It’s okay, it’s okay.”

“I love you so much atto, it doesn’t even matter if you can’t swim with me because I just want you to be safe because I love you so much.”

“I know,” Ecthelion said, trying to reassure his daughter as she sobbed. “I love you so much too, my Ilvanë. So so much. And I really am sorry I can’t go swimming with you.”

Ilvanë pulled back, eyes red, tears running down her face still. Her bottom lip quivered and she sniffled. The sight of his little girl so upset broke Ecthelion’s heart. 

“I don’t care if you don’t swim with me,” she said, voice barely above a whisper. “I just don’t want you to be sad.”

Ecthelion pulled her back into his arms as she began to sob again, cradling her and promising that he wasn’t sad. 

“Ilvanë, dearest, if I have you, and Laitar, and your atar, I’ll be the happiest person alive for the rest of my life, and I can promise you that, because I’ve never been happier than when you and your sibling were born.”

Ilvanë nodded into his chest. She yawned, curling up against her atto with a sniffle. Ecthelion picked up a blanket resting on the chair next to them, draping it over her. 

“I love you,” he said as she nodded off, clearly spent from the time spent both crying and running all the way home. 

“I love you too,” Ilvanë mumbled, closing her eyes. Ecthelion kissed the top of her head, and made a mental note to have a talk with Ilvanë’s teacher. He was sure that there had been no harm intended, but he wanted to be informed the next time Ilvanë learned about something that could upset her so, like Glorfindel or Laitar’s death. 

After filing away the note, Ecthelion realised that he was quite comfortable, covered in half the blanket and with the safe weight of his sleeping daughter on top of them. He closed his eyes, listening to the sounds of the nature around him and Ilvanë’s soft breathing.

Glorfindel cherished the sight of his daughter and husband asleep on a chair together as one of his favourite memories.


End file.
